I was offered to the great white dragon Augaurath. It was the greatest honour among us kobolds. I was gonna be remembered as a hero—savior of our tribe. The dragon chuckled at our poor offer, calling me Not Edible
But just you wait, just you wait. Augaurath will have the tastier meal ever. One day, I’ll be like one of these thanksgiving bonanzas.

Mr. Redcap is on a vacation trying to save Good mead. He gave me this tome with some tales. I am not sure what to do with it. Is this a recipe book?

Guess I’m gonna help adventurers make a delicious clam chowder.

Ingredients

• A party of adventures, preferrably 6 or 7
• An ice mephit
• Four big sharks, portioned in pairs
• Some clams
• Three shipwrecks
• f***ing cold water
• Any other ingredients that go into a clam chowder

Instructions

1. First, you need really curious and bold adventures not afraid of cold water. Make the ice mephit tell then about exploits of gold and magic items in the shipwrecks.

2. Make sure to have a monk among your party of adventurers, lets name him Leigh. Encouraged by the ice mephit, Leigh dives into the shipwreck to search for treasures. Meanwhile, the other party members might want to tie a rope to the ship’s mast and imagine how to safely cross it.

3. Release your first pair of hungry sharks. Their objective is to chew any party members in the water so that they get super tired and in need of really good clam chowder. When the monk notices he is surrounded by sharks, the other party members should go help him. If you have an artificer, let’s say Wreckage, you can add some extra flavour if the said artificer slides through a rope in the vain hope of saving Leigh while also stumbling over other party members that are trying to cross that rope and shoving them into the water.

4. DO NOT kill the party. Some clever ways for them to escape the hungry sharks involve a druid, Or’o, summoning sacrificial animals so the sharks get distracted and the adventurers escape the first shipwreck.

5. Let the party argue for a bit. They should decide if they will attempt a second shipwreck or storm Auril’s skull fortress. If the party leans towards the fortress, make sure that one of the party members – Kravathar – naively remembers that they have a spell that helps people walk over water.

6. Emboldened by the new spell. The party attempts the second shipwreck. Nothing impressive here, just a couple of clams. They look really tasty.

7. Finally, at the last shipwreck, split the party. Splitting the party always brings a lot of spiciness to the dish, or how we kobolds usually say Umami. Half the party show stay at a clifftop watching their friends dive into the f***ing cold water one last time. Wait a couple of minutes while the curious adventurers move towards their peril.

8. Release your second pair of sharks. Preferably, super hungry and bad sharks. They will chop a few chunks of the party members who are in the water.

Swimming away from the sharks back to shore, the members on the clifftop watch in dread. Some, as myself, try to find a long-range weapon just to remember that they don’t have one.

Remember! One of the biggest things for cooking the right meal is set up, Mise en place in old draconic. Always organize and arrange your equipment before an adventure or you will find yourself in dire need of a crossbow or a longbow as I was—shame on me.

Back to the swimming party. At this point, you should barely see them as the water is full of blood, and they are at death’s door. Miraculously, they escape.

9. The exhausted party realizes that sight-seeing shipwrecks was not a good idea. In dire need of resting, they should take out one of the scavenged clams and cook a delicious clam chowder.

10.Enjoy your meal

Notes

Be careful about step 6, a lot of beginners erroneously release the second pair of sharks here. If you do that, there is a huge risk that the sharks might kill whoever is underwater trying to grab the clams for the chowder. If you do that, you have unfortunately ruined your dish.

Details were omitted and/or modified, so I don’t spoil much of an official Adventures League game. I am not a native speaker and this is a small exercise to improve my writing. Please be kind.